lovely: Archive

wish

I didn’t lay awake wondring what’s to happen next of this mess iv made of myself for not give up on something I know is nothing? Why can’t I just give up let it go I know I’m a strong person but its got to be my lowest when it comes to u . Ur not what I need for myself . I say over over again I wanna stick up for myself I want u to be the one that knows how it feels

Jul 6th

ready

For vaction . I’m tired working so much and having no life . School in augest I’m pretty excited life is going somewhere . Nervous I hope I love it

May 13th

you

Made me realize three months I went with out talking to You I was like and idiot I fell back into your words or more less your pills talking. Nice try buddy I’m done u will never change. I need better for my self. And not bullshit u give me. IV realized I never mentioned shit to u Just to ur pills that’s the only time you are so in love with me. . Do me huge fav and don’t...

Apr 28th

Staph.

If this is you again can we please justs get along and go away :] k thanks. … Next month sugery.. blah does it ever end? Thinking not.. Sometimes i feel like cheacking my self into the crazy house!!!

Dec 20th

Real

Nervous about this sugery.. I hate being put to sleep more then anything.. Its all gunna come to soon.. But then maybe ill feel better after weeks of recovery..

Dec 14th

..

Um.. I wonder :]

Dec 3rd

wow

My prayer was answerd moven to a new place where i can even take my horse and do work to it myself it will be like my own home im so happy my cusin gets to live with me and gucci we are gunna love it wow :]

Nov 5th

Its

So crazy moving back in.. I love my family to death but i think im better with living on my own and my mom is to.. I feel bad but its to croweded here and i dont have enuff room thats sad to say my things take a good roll ha. Now im looking for a house :] im glad i can finally afford a house nice one insted of my ghetto apartment! Good times there for sure. But its time to for something...

Nov 2nd

eh..

hope for the best. really wish the dr would call soon.. :/

Oct 19th

Blah

I wish i wasnt sick.. this sucks!! I just wanna be back to my ol self! im really happy things are goin the way they are tho.. :] staying postive no matter wut!!

Oct 10th

well..

ahh i wish my health wasnt goin down south! but im gunna stay postive watch wut i eat and do better for myself! Things are at there best rite now and im loven it :]

Oct 6th

things

cant be better! :) finally doing good for myself.. Had a badass weekend.. Ready for a good week so far. happy i feel good also. Ready for so much commen up.

Sep 21st

you

cant be jelous of something or somone wen thats never wut u wanted ur self to be or act like.. Late night thinking cant sleep miss my frenns. Had enjoyable time spending with alex hearing about her collage life . Im excited and happy for her! im ready to rodeo again.. Move home get my health stright. Things seem to be good farly well as of rite now :) but it always has ups and downs gunna stay...

Sep 9th

funny

how u think the people around you are dumb and dont know.. but ur the dumb one cuz they do.. And ur playing it off just dosent work to well.. cuz everyone around u knows! ur nothing to my life anymoree.. I relize wut kinda person you are..

Jun 24th

sleepless

anouther night! sleepless the night befor same worked 12 houres and still awake wuts wrong with me my body iss not getting any better its waring me down even worse :/ but there is nothing i can do i guess my body will tell itself went thats enuff?? i suppose??

Jun 8th

Wish

This sickness would be gone :[ I wanna do stuff but i cant! Sugery in aguest! bummer summer ends short. Iv been thinking alot.. and your not who i need in my life anymore.. It wont ever be the same and it hasnt. Things change and so do people. We are gunna go our way and fallow our own dreams. You always think its about you. or have some negtive outlook.. or soemthing rude to say.. and its...

Jun 7th

Finally

put it all togather nothing last forever!

May 13th

Somehow

seem to let it goo.. I shouldnt its a shitty thing to do.. but i did.. people say im dumb.. But they just dont understand. Maybe wen they become like us they will?

May 13th

Why

Do i worrie or let you get to me?? fuck you!! really is all i wanna say.. you always there i cant get you out!!

May 12th

May 10th

I need

Sleep but sleep never comes! not this week or next week! No time.. Im not afraid of wut i have to say.. anymore. oh your smile got me..

May 10th

I could care less of who you are anymore. I wish my identy didnt get taken.. this is fucking me over big time.. ! ITs so much stress.. This week is goin to be crazy so much is happing and i love it! Im glad im gunna be doing it on my own and have something goin for myself. Things cant be better neather can friends. Iv met so many new people in the last few weeks now im ready to party...

May 10th

I

Wanna figure out who i am. What i like.. not to be juged.

Jan 12th

Become

Something more. Try harder! Get things done.. stopp putting them off. Stopp letting people walk all over you. Be strong.. Be independent! Work hard. Be yourself! Have fun. Stayy postive. Make the best of evrything. Everything happens for a reason. Do what you want.. Dont let outhers do what you should do yourself! Live to the fullest everyday! Dont let outher people bother you! ...

Jan 4th

Feels like

Beating somone up :]] and being a big bitch :]] on and on.. I just needa go to the gymm befor i kill somone thank god for 24 hr gymm :]]

Dec 30th

Happy..

This year has been good . Next year is gunna be better. Graduation :] lots to look forward too. Im excited.. Im ready to stop smoken after the new year :] Stop partying so much.. cuz my mom thinks i need aa meetings. paha she is nuts i love her tho . Befor the year is over.. haveing a party :]] Iv been working hard Im proud of myself. lots of money. Im gunna save more money after the first...

Dec 28th

Wonder

Where my time goes in a day .. Im always a busy bee now.. sometimes i love it then i dont.. Im exhusted i wish i slept more but its okay at least i dont sleep all the dayumm time. Everything this year has been the best . Best year in a long while for sure.. Ready for so much more. iv gotten close to people i thought i wouldnt.

Dec 9th

Has

A big decision to make soon.. Im doing this and no one can talk me outta this this is what i have to do this is what im going to do. I have so much to do and think about.. My mind feels like its exploding. I have who i need in my life to stand behind me and be here for me. they may not be happy about it but i know they know this is what i wanna do so they are gunna be there. Im happy my mom...

Nov 15th

boyy

keep your head high. dont give somone the world that wouldnt give u the day . :)

Oct 25th

Looks

Like im having sugery now :[ God this sucks!! Sick sick sick… I dont wanna miss work :[ Home on a saterday nite the first in so long not to bad gives me time to rest and think about so much! Talking about collage today with my mom :]] Im goin for pre-vett Collage is kinda far but i can do it. And meet new friends :] come home on weekends! Im kinda excited now i know what i actually...

Oct 18th

Well

umm oh well.. lets hope this week is better i still cant sleep.. im so exhusted. I wish i could sleep for days on end! work always makes mee feell better crazyness.. Um i feel more and more distant! oh well… :/ nite..

Oct 6th

No

Matter how much we dont talk.. No matter how often we dont see eachouther we always know we will be best friends! This weekend was wonderful. Happy to see my best freind. had a good time just chillen.. well long week ahead! work and school. I love my new job.. This weekend is gonna be supper busy with my sis wedding! so much is goin on rite now! I feel wonderful. only if i could breath!...

Sep 8th

This

Is going to be the best year.. Sr year is alreayd funn :]] Im way excited.. Getting closer with old friends its been fun.. Im way ready .

Aug 14th

well shitt.

Blah this weeek blowss bigg ones!! Going to the dentest then shopping then work… sleepy :[ hair cute tommrow at 11.. yaya :]]

Aug 11th

You

Will never know the way i feel. I was happy to see you the outher nite but sad cuz it brings back old feelings! you where a boii that never once made me feel sad untill everything feel apart! Its always been something with you. I hate that your trapped and confused. I can only wait for months to find out. Im prolly only hurting myself. I dont need you but i want you cuz you always made me...

Aug 11th

Shoot

Long nite last nite blah.. a lil tired for today but ready for the day :]] shopping today.. sisters shower then to the mall. blahh dont really feel like talking maybe some toms today :]] thats wuts up. school starts this week ahh.. fml. :] oh well last year thank god.. so whats good?

Aug 8th

Oh my

DEAR!!! Iv been up all nite. ;] walmart at 4am was amazing. umm much needed nap for the day yes :]] I love how people ask to do things then you never know.. oh well. movies sunday :]

Aug 1st

I LOVE

Bricktown and good food there :]] went with megan.. At blackers now staying here tonite.. Talking about old times with him and meg. I love that my parents are being cool for weekends in a row now :]] well thay always are but they are bein way cooler now :]] i love them. nite loves!

Aug 1st

OH

Its the weekend whats in store?? work moneymaken :]]

Jul 31st

Way

Funny that you say that! Cuz thats all it will ever be about and the only reason they stick around. haha people are fucking dumm. ahh no sleep :\ Work has yet been amazingly wonderful again this week! I think im starting to like my job. :]] well more. I really wanna go see a movie this weekend.. bruno.? umm. or my sisters keeper?? or both.. ill take my momma! Im ready to go see Donita...

Jul 31st

Im in this

Mood: That i dont give a fuck :]] Weird.. Um people will come and go and thats okay. Life seems to have a new out look for me. Im ready for the weekend.

Jul 31st

Amazing!

How people think everything is fine when its really not nor will it ever be again! It may seem like it is … but deep down its not!

Jul 29th

I HATE!!!!!

The food show!! But i love it!!! ALL I WANNA DO IS EAT OMG THE FOOD LOOKS SO GOOD …….. IM GONNA BE A FATASS IF I KEEP UP WITH THIS!!

Jul 28th

DEAR GAGE!

Weird! I WAS JUST LOOKING AT TOMS ALSO! AND TELLING MY MOM I WAS GONNA ORDER SOME !! HANICE!

Jul 28th

It dont!

Come offten! Last nite seemed to mean alot to me! Im happy i seen my second family they mean the world to me! It sucks sometimes not seeing them as much as i would like! Maybe soon things will change and i will see them more! I loved seeing Millybug! gosh she is getting so big! seeing grandpa was good he is the most amazing strongest person i have met. And hard headed I told him last nite to...

Jul 27th

ohmy!

My foot is so sore! I love it :] I love tattoos :]] ready for more now :)

Jul 26th

Ready

For tonite :] Not one weekend has been lame so far! Im happy to be doin new things. Im so ready for my tattoo tommrow :]] Ah ready for the lake next weekend and to see my family. but cant get in the water cuz my new tattoo oh well guess ill just viset them and drink some cold oneS? sounds even better ha! work is gonna be a blow off today! :] money in the bank. peace

Jul 24th

funny

How that you will always be there for someone but its the sad thing they wont be there for you! Its life and its People! :] fuck it . ah haveing sugery in a few months! im so not ready for this one :[ scarryness.

Jul 24th

YA BUDDY!

I love to tan. I always think so much when i tan and i love it. Im excited to go out friday nite: ]] Work has been wonderfull this week! supprised! New tattooo at noon on sat im way excited :]]]

Jul 24th

snap!

Its too danm early! no sleep! work :[ then dr! what a day a head! seems like its always dr dr dr.. i wanna scream! :] ready for the weekend already!

Jul 22nd